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Yo mama jokes

best yo mama jokesYo mama jokes are some of the most hilarious and funny jokes. These are the jokes that have been made on the mothers is a unique and funny way. The Yo mama jokes can be used on the friend but make sure that you do not say them in front of your mothers because we all love them so much.

    • Yo momma so black Batman came and said damn b*tch I thought I was the dark night.
    • Yo mama smells so bad A bar of soap she uses loses it smell
    • Yo momma so poor, that when I asked to use the bathroom she said « Pick a corner, any corner! »
    • Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow paincoat, people said « taxi! »
    • Yo mama so dumb she asked you « What is the number for 911? »
    • Yo mama so dirty when she wash up her water look like chocolate.
    • Yo mama so dumb she talks in a envelope to send the voice mail.
    • Yo mama so tall when she jump in the sky it hit jesus’ balls
    • Yo mama so butch, she’s the worlds first a one-legged lesbian kick boxer.
    • Yo momma is so poor I saw her kicking a trash can so I asked « What are you doing? » and she said, « I’m moving. »
    • Yo mama has a glass leg and she uses Windex for lotion.
    • Yo mama so poor her face is on The front of a food stamp.
    • Yo mama got more extensions, then AT&T.
    • Yo Momma so poor she hangs the Toilet paper out to dry
    • Yo mama teeth so big when she sneezes she pokes a hole throw her stomach.
    • Yo mama so skinny, she uses a Band-Aid as a maxi-pad.
    • Yo mama so fat that Bill Gates couldn’t pay for her liposuction.
    • Yo mama so ugly she gives Freddy Krueger nightmares.
    • Yo mama so full of shit her eyes are brown.
    • Yo mama so skinny, when she wore her yellow dress, she looked like a #2 pencil.
    • Yo mama’s legs so skinny, she looks like a blow pop.
    • Yo mama so skinny she can use a bracelet as a hula hoop
    • Yo mama so skinny, she looks like a mic stand.
    • Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and disappeared.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, her nipples touch.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, if she turned sideways and stuck out her tongue, she would look like a zipper.
    • Yo mama so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, she had to stand in the same place twice to cast a shadow.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, she has to wear skis in the shower.
    • Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio.
    • Yo momma so fat when God said let it be light he told your momma to move.
    • Yo mama is so fat that when Dracula drank her blood she gave him diabetes.
    • Yo mama so fat Mount Everest tried to climb her.
    • Yo momma so fat when she fell no one laughed but the ground started cracking up.
    • Yo mama’s feet so big, her sneakers need license plates. What do you say when you are consoling a grammar Nazi? there, their, they’re.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff she provided the backdrop for White Christmas.
    • Yo mama’s so dirty grass grows in her belly button.
    • Yo mama’s so dirty mold forms on her teeth.
    • Yo mama’s so dirty mice go mud wrestling in her belly button.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff her family uses it to stuff pillows and quilts.
    • Yo Mama is so stupid, she tried to tape glue.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff she needs to defrost it before combing her hair.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff polar bears use her hair as camouflage.
    • Yo mama’s so fat, she went out in high heels and came back in flip flops.
    • Yo mama is so small that she plays handball on the curb.
    • Yo mama’s so bald she curls her hair with rice.
    • Yo mama is so stupid, I told her Christmas was right around the corner – so she went looking for it.
    • Yo Momma so stupid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting,  »Wait! Stop! Thieves! You forgot the remote! »
    • Yo mama so fat that her belly button makes an echo!
    • Yo mama’s so poor, when I walked in and asked « Whats for Dinner? » She pulled out a shotgun and said « Next person that moves! »
    • Yo mama so dumb when I told her a Tsunami hit, she said « Why didn’t you hit back? »
    • Yo mama so dumb she took a cup to see Juice.
    • Yo mama is so fat, when the judge said « order », she order a milkshake, cheeseburger, and fries.
    • Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a cup and told the police she got mugged.
    • Yo mamma is so fat she doesn’t need the internet, because she’s already world wide.
    • Yo mama so bald even a wig wouldn’t help!
    • Yo mama so dumb she sprayed a tree with axe body spray and thought it would fall down.
    • Yo mama is so poor that when she saw a take a penny tray she said, I can’t afford that.
    • Yo mama so poor, her T.V. has two channels: ON and OFF.
    • Yo mama hair so nappy she has to take Tylenol just to comb it.
    • Yo mama so poor, I saw her banging on a trash can, asked what she was doing, and she said, My kids locked me out.
    • Yo mama’s profile so jacked up she has her own reality show « Pimp my sides. »
    • Yo mama so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk.
    • Yo mama so fat, she has a real horse on her Polo shirt.
    • Your mom is so fat and so black when she goes into the ocean people say,  »Ahh! Oil spill! »
    • Yo mama cross-eyed and watches TV in stereo.
    • Yo mama so skinny, she inspires crack whores to diet.
    • Yo mama so skinny, I gave her a piece of popcorn and she went into a coma.
    • Yo mama so skinny, if she had a yeast infection she’d be a Quarter Pounder with Cheese.
    • Yo mama so skinny, she can dodge rain drops.
    • Yo momma so skinny she ate a M&M and looked 8 months pregnant.
    • Yo mama so skinny, she could dive through a fence
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, if she had dreads I’d grab her by the ankles and use her to mop the floor.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, if she had a sesame seed on her head, she’d look like a push pin.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, her pants have one belt loop.
    • Yo momma so skinny I put a dime on her head and people mistook her for a Nail.
    • Yo mama so fat when she goes swimming the whales start singing We are Family
    • Yo mama so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
    • Yo mama so fat she wore a yellow raincoat and people yelled Taxi!
    • Yo mama is so stupid that when she had phonesex she had to go to hospital to get her iphone removed.
    • Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.
    • Yo mama’s so dirty even the rats shout: « Unclean! Unclean! »
    • Yo mama’s so dirty her idea of a bubble bath is to eat baked beans for dinner.
    • Yo mama’s so dirty her farts register eight on the Richter scale.
    • Yo mama’s so dirty she actually repels mosquitoes.

 

Best yo mama jokes

 

    • Yo mama’s so dirty her tights walk to the laundry basket by themselves.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff they are holding the next Winter Olympics at her house.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff it looks like she’s permanently wearing a white bobble hat.
    • Yo mama’s so fat, when she farted pluto’s ice caps melted.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff when a fly landed on her head, it said: « I ain’t seen this much snow in years! »
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, she used a needle for a baseball bat.
    • Yo mama’s so lactose intolerant, human kindness makes her throw up!
    • Yo Mama is so stupid, she put a stamp on a fax.
    • Yo Mama is so fat, that when she dances, the band skips!
    • Yo mama is so skinny that she can see out a peephole with both eyes.
    • Yo mama smells so bad A bar of soap she uses loses it smell
    • Yo momma so stupid she taped paper to her window. And called it payperview
    • Yo mama so dumb she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
    • Yo mama is so dumb she thinks that Harlem shake is a drink.
    • Yo momma is so stupid that she sat on the TV watching the couch.
    • Yo Mama’s so dirty, she went swimming and made the Dead Sea.
    • Yo mama so dumb she sprayed a tree with axe body spray and thought it would fall down.
    • Yo mama so tall when I tell her to bend over she’s still taller than me.
    • Yo momma is so fat that Dora can’t even explore her!
    • Yo mama is so poor, for Christmas, she bought you a tape of children opening their presents.
    • Yo mama so poor, her Welcome mat doesn’t say Welcome; it says Welfare.
    • Yo mama is so poor she had to squeeze her own milk out for her children to have cereal
    • Yo mama so poor, her address is This Side Up.
    • Yo mamas butt hairs are so long they get clogged in the toilet when she flushes.
    • Yo mama’s ass is so hairy they have it on a sign at Yellowstone saying « Don’t feed the bears »
    • Yo mama so skinny, she swallowed a meatball and thought she was pregnant.
    • Yo mamma’s so fat and old when God said, « Let there be light, » He asked your mother to move out of the way.
    • Yo mama so stank so bad she scared the sewer away.
    • Yo mama so skinny, she has to run around in the shower to get wet.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, she uses Chapstick for deodorant.
    • Yo mama so skinny, instead of calling her your parent, you call her transparent. Why was the groundhog depressed about his den? He was having a bad lair day!
    • Yo mama so skinny she can hang glide off a dorito
    • Yo mama is so thin that if she stands in front of a wall she looks like a crack.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, she can see out the peephole with both eyes.
    • Yo mama so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, she can grate cheese on her ribs.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, her bra fits better backward.
    • Yo mama’s so skinny, when she holds her arms up she falls through her shirt and hangs herself.
    • Yo mama so fat she’s got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book.
    • Yo mama is so fat that when Dracula drank her blood she gave him diabetes.
    • Yo mamma so fat she broke your family tree.
    • Yo mama so fat not even Dora can explore her.
    • Yo mama’s feet so big, her sneakers need license plates.
    • Yo mama’s so dirty you can tell her age by counting the rings around her.

 

More funny yo mama jokes

 

    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff it looks like she’s been the victim of an air raid by a squadron of pigeons.
    • Yo mama’s so dirty after you shake her hand you have to be quarantined.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff she can simulate desiccated coconut with a single scratch.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff when she shakes her head outside they have to clear the street with a snow plough.
    • Yo mama so small, she can hang glide on a Dorito.
    • Yo mama’s got so much dandruff she has more flakes than Cadbury’s.
    • Yo mama’s so fat she uses two greyhound buses as rollerblades.
    • Yo mama’s like a chipmunk, her cheeks are always packed full of nuts!
    • Yo mama so poor, she fills her ice trays with toilet water!
    • Yo mama’s so sorry she missed your birthday last week, she bought you a cake so big you gotta eat it twice to have it once!
    • Yo mama’s so fat that when she sees a school bus she yells, « Stop that Twinkie! »

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